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UNITEDRANT

Wasters FC

July 13, 2011 Tags: Just for fun 21 comments

Kieron Dyer’s imminent transfer to Queens Park Rangers suggests a question: has there ever been a player who has taken so much out of football but given so little back? Dyer, reportedly earning £83,000 per week at West Ham United, has played just 30 games in four years at Upton Park. He cost the Londoners an extra £500,000 per year in ‘image rights’ on top of a £6 million transfer fee.

In this spirit Rant has put together Wasters FC. An outfit not of the worst players in the history of football but those who took so much, with so little in return.

Contributions from: @brannigan84 @Fino76 @Jebbster1975 and many others.

Wasters FC – Owner: Malcom Glazer. Chair: Sepp Blatter. Manager: Brian Little

Stuart Taylor, Goalkeeper: Taylor, the standard-bearer for reserve goalkeeping – has played just 69 league games since turning pro in 1997.

Marco Boogers, right-back: so depressed after being sent off for West Ham against Manchester United that Boogers disappeared for two days leading to the now infamous Sun headline: “Barmy Boogers Living In A Caravan”.

Jonathan Woodgate, centre-back: perennially injured, cumulative transfer fees of £30 million, wages in excess of £80,000, and just 120 games in the past eight years.

Winston Bogaarde, centre-back: sat out a four-year, £40,000 per week, contract at Chelsea, playing just nine games in the process.

Asier del Horno, left-back: £7 million transfer fee brought him to Chelsea, 25 failed games later and the Spaniard was sent home. Last seen at lowly Levante.

Andy van der Meyde, right-wing: sent off on début and that was about as good as it got for the Dutchman, who played just 20 games in four years for Everton.

Tomas Brolin, centre midfield: retired aged just 29 having last played for Hudiksvalls but it is the three horrendous years at Leeds United that the podgy Swede is best ‘remembered’ for in England.

Kieron Dyer, centre midfield (c): see above!

Paolo Future, left-wing: played 60 games for seven clubs after leaving Atletico Madrid in 1993, including a disastrous spell at West Ham in 1997. Nine games, no goals and few fans.

Freddy Adu, striker: better than George Best, quicker than Pélé, more skillfull than Diego Maradona… older than Nelson Mandela … and last seen playing for Çaykur Rizespor in the Turkish second division. Still made millions from Nike sponsorship.

Denílson de Oliveira Araújo, striker: once the world’s most expensive player. Last three clubs: AO Kavala, Xi Măng Hải Phòng, Itumbiara. No Rant hadn’t heard of them either.

Bench: Chris Kirkland, Alfonso Alves, Harry Kewell, Steve Marlet, Jody Morris, Franny Jeffers, Hugo Viana, Sergei Rebrov, Bosko Balaban …. and so many more!

21 comments

captainhormone - July 13, 2011 Reply

owen hargreaves..

TheCantona - March 7, 2012 Reply

disagree. he played important role when we won double in 07/08

Homez213 - July 13, 2011 Reply

Hagreaves should make the bench at least, especially for the games missed the last 3 seasons.

Jamois - July 13, 2011 Reply

I think Brian Little for manager a little harsh and feel there must be more suitable candidates. Stuart Houston comes to mind (as a QPR fan). Or perhaps Trevor Francis, Graham Taylor, Graham Souness, Christian Gross, etc.

Ed - July 14, 2011 Reply

Jamois – all good candidates… although Little is now managing Gainsborough Trinity. Who are they? Exactly!

Curtis - July 13, 2011 Reply

Owen Hargreaves for sure.

Adu is still only 22, don’t forget that. While he has been a waste thus far, he isn’t in the same league as some of these other folks.

captainhormone - July 13, 2011 Reply

Commenter said:
Owen Hargreaves for sure.

Adu is still only 62, don’t forget that. While he has been a waste thus far, he isn’t in the same league as some of these other folks.

captainhormone - July 13, 2011 Reply

Commenter said:
Owen Hargreaves for sure.
Adu is still only 62, don’t forget that. While he has been a waste thus far, he isn’t in the same league as some of these other folks.

LKHF

faffing

captainhormone - July 13, 2011 Reply

that is better

Curtis - July 13, 2011 Reply

He just seems old because he was made to be such a big deal when he was so young. He was on the covers of magazines at 13!

He has been a waste, undeniable, but he is definitely not 62. Just been around awhile.

squigs - July 13, 2011 Reply

Manucho and Bebe shouldn’t be far off this list,

In fairness I think Woodgate will be a brilliant signing for Stoke if they can keep him fit and Van Der Meyde and Brolin were established internationals.

andrew - July 13, 2011 Reply

Harsh putting Bebe in there with that company above….he put in, scored a couple of goals and I think tried to take the opportunity of a lifetime.

squigs - July 13, 2011 Reply

Van Der Meyde has 20 caps for Holland and made the list, Bebe is literally a bum by comparison.

Alfonso Bedoya - July 14, 2011 Reply

I like this… “He cost the Londoners an extra £500,000 per year in ‘image rights’ on top of a £6 million transfer fee.”
What image was that, then?
This maybe???

That’s a face that could go on a “just say no to sniffing glue” poster.

“Badges, to god-damned hell with badges! We have no badges. In fact, we don’t need badges. I don’t have to show you any stinking badges, you god-damned cabrón and ching’ tu madre! Come out from that shit-hole of yours. I have to speak to you.”

OneEyedCactus - July 14, 2011 Reply

How about Torres since January 2010? Also for manager it’d be hard to beat McLaren

Spudiator - July 14, 2011 Reply

Steve McClaren? That’s ridiculous, he may have been a flop as England manager, a role he was never suited to anyway, but he did pretty well with Middlesbrough and Twente. If we’re talking hopeless managers, I’d have said Chris Hutchings myself, he twice succeeded Paul Jewell (at Bradford and then Wigan, I’m not counting his time at Derby because he was only a stand-in then and only managed one game anyway) and both times ended up sacked after less than 6 months, got sacked as Walsall manager too (albeit after 2 years that time).

Also, to those mentioning Bebe, that’s just idiotic, he’s a young kid just starting his career and has barely been on the scene at United 5 minutes. This is presumably the same morons who wrote Patrice Evra off as one of United’s worst ever signings after only 6 months at the club (damn, I wish I’d made a note of who actually said that for future reference).

ja - July 14, 2011 Reply

At least half the City squad…

vlad - July 14, 2011 Reply

Bloody Veron who lost us the title

squigs - July 14, 2011 Reply

In fairness Image rights, was little more then a tax avoidance scheme for years.

Spike - July 17, 2011 Reply

Savage
I hate the cunt

andrew - July 17, 2011 Reply

Add Scholes to that group – never tried in interviews, never helped flog Nike merch. Selfish cunt.

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